Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Predictions for 2008

2/17/08 - Vans Aircraft will announce that kits for the RV-12 are ready to ship. Their entire stock is purchased by 2/18/08.

2/25/08 - The first kit-built RV-12 takes to the skies. A spokesman for Vans states, "Maybe we made it TOO easy...?"

3/1/08 - Vans Aircraft announces that they are hiring an additional 937 employees to keep up with demand for their aircraft.

4/30/08 - Due to the huge numbers of RV-12's flying, the President announces that all of the billions of tax dollars paid by taxes from G.A. pilots will be used to build 1,000 new, regional airports. The Dow Jones jumps 948.4 points in a single day on the news, in anticipation of the increased revenue this will generate.

7/9/08 - A new aircraft engine is designed that flies on methane derived from cows. The tanks, to hold the methane, are 5 pounds in each wing and hold enough fuel to fly non-stop from 6S4 to RSW. Tillamook, Oregon becomes the center of the aviation world and farmers have to be on guard for poop poachers.

9/3/08 - Airbus announces a new jet that seats 1,790 passengers in 5 levels. They plan to invest €800B for development of the aircraft. They fail to realize that the plane needs 27 miles to get airborne and that no airport will be able to handle takeoffs and landings. In a bid to salvage the project, they announce that they will seat only 500 in lavish suites with hot tubs and large screen TV's in each room and start their own airline...MileHigh Airlines. The management gives themselves a €127M bonus for their great thinking.

10/12/08 - A new panel instrument will be developed that will emit a 240 db shriek and will spray ice water into the face of pilots 15 minutes before they run out of fuel. The effect of this is to totally eliminate fuel starvation crashes. The same company will also announce that another flight instrument is being developed to avoid inadvertent flight into clouds by VFR pilots. They announce that they are having developmental problems. It seems the hammer that knocks the pilot in the head tends to render the pilot unconscious. They claim confidence that this problem can be solved by the end of the year.

11/7/08 - The NTSB will disband due to the fact that there was not a single aircraft accident this year.

12/12/08 - Vans announces that the 700th RV-12 rose into the air today. Cessna and Piper file for Chapter 11 on the release of the news.

12/25/08 - You will get a new plane for Christmas.

Wishing you a great 2008! Do you have any predictions?

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